Can’t You Tell?!?!?!

Ah, yes ladies and germs. I am stupendously privileged. I can summon all white people within a 30 miles radius to come help with a lynching. All white people have that power actually. I’m constantly oppressing black people and women. Literally all the time. Even when I don’t mean to. I’ll just be eating dinner and low and behold, a black guy shoots another black guy somewhere in a ghetto. I’m trying to stop. But it’s like, I just wake up every day and want to subjugate those that don’t look like me. Or, well–my ancestors did, maybe, kinda, sorta, I don’t fucking know. So obviously I must be a raishuss sumbitch, hillbilly, implicit bias muh fucka, right naw, can’t you tell?

1. I was raised not only in a divorce culture-style America, but in the heart of it all, with a divorced couple. And not the friendly, easy-going, still friends and all that. No, my parents shit talk each other on a somewhat regular basis. To show even an ounce of love for either one feels like I’m betraying the other. That was put on me. And it’s certainly made me a well-rounded, not at all cynical individual. Can’t you tell?!

2. I’ve had electronics, Internet-access, and a cell phone pretty much my whole life. Now, I’m not at all suggesting I’m going to fall into this deviation I’m about to mention. But there’s a surge of 20-30 year olds still living with mom and paps coming in. I don’t know if you’ve noticed. Aaaaaand I think peppering kids with all that they want and never reigning them in, has contributed to that, to an extent, if not entirely. I mean, fuck. Every bad ass person I’ve met that “got their shit together” at a young age…didn’t really have SHIT at a young age. They were poor, they grow up in unstable households. They HAD to get their shit together.

3. I’m white, which means I risk not getting a job I deserve, because a lesser-qualified minority wants it and the company’s quota for that particular “marginalized” group hasn’t been filled yet. Lucky me. Another great thing about my skin color is the freedom of speech. For example, I can totally say the word “nigger” like–anywhere, if I wanted to. And nobody would care. Like, in any context. To any person. Can’t you tell?!?!

4. I’m tall, which means certain girls that would otherwise be repulsed by me if I were less than 6 ft, for some reason want to fuck me. I guess they want something to climb. Or someone to “ask them nicely–pretty please” if they wouldn’t mind reeeeeaching that for them. Mmmmm. Oh, and I’m gonna die sooner than all you non-tall mother fuckers. So. There’s that. But other than that, ya know, dying sooner, women liking me for superficial reasons, hitting your head on shelves put there for short people, being a walking tree is a fucking hoot, mayun!

But fuck it, I’m going to make this country spit the blue pill out anyway, despite having not grown up a tiny Asian boy with no step parents or excessive spoils. Because I can do without and work with what I’ve got. You can only deny gender differences for so long, especially as research continues to come to light piling onto the evidence, not that we even need it. Society managed to understand for a long time without all the science, but then feminism decided to come in and fuck things up after Betty Friedan came to the conclusion in the early 60’s that “society” was responsible for making her work a job, be a mother, and the wife of a degenerate, all at once.

And most of you have bought her bullshit, Marxist propaganda hook line and sinker. Makes me sick.

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