Social Media Parents

One of the things that irritates me about parents is how much of a public boner they have for their kids. I suppose this has always been the case. But with web 2.0 and all, sharing said boner is a lot easier nowadays and seems fucking inevitable.

It doesn’t even annoy me. I just have to scroll past it. Your kid however has to suffer the consequences later in life, when these pictures are dug up off the cloud and distributed throughout all their high school classes. Have you thought about this? Have you considered whether or not it’s good for your child? No, of course not. You just saw your kid do something cute and jumped on the impulse to capitalize off of it and score some likes. Fucking despicable.

You should be taking pictures of your kids and sharing them online with their fucking permission, during say—events, like their 10th birthday, or graduation. Not every hour of every day. Nobody needs to see that shit. Nobody cares. Except maybe the two or three pedophiles you’ve yet to isolate from your friends list.

Do you really have such a pathological urge to plaster every moment of your child’s life online until adulthood? I don’t care for what reason you’re doing it. It’s wrong.

  • I just wanna build their self-esteem, man. — Great. Then encourage them every step of the way, don’t abuse them, and don’t put them on blast, 24/7 in front of all your fucking friends, dumb ass.
  • I just want them likes, man. People love babies. — Wow. At least you’re honest. An honest piece of shit that is. What am I to think your reaction would be if your child died. “Awww, damn. I almost had like 5,000 likes on that bitch. Shit. Tim! I need you to get me pregnant again. Quick!”
  • I’m just bored, man. It gives me purpose. — I’m not making these up. I’ve heard these all before, plenty of times. Yes, some parents opt to condemn their child to endless humiliation on the cloud—because they have nothing fucking better to do. God. Damn. What did these fuckers do before they had kids?!