Before you read, understand this. I don’t give a fuck if you’ve been married to someone for 50+ years, never cheated, always fuck, never fight, blah blah blah. I. Don’t. Care. I’m happy for you both. But you guys are freaks. The exception. Humans simply do not function the way you two do. So take your experiences out of the equation please, as a reasonable trans person would their’s in a discussion about making it illegal to “misgender” people.

  • It’s unrealistic.
    • They say you “shouldn’t settle”. Yet, we’re all needy people. If we truly didn’t settle for anyone, nobody would be getting married. For there’s always something that crosses somebody’s threshold. God forbid it becomes necessary to “bring the spark” back into your marriage.
      • They say, “ooh, there’s nearly 10 billion humans out there, people.” Yea, and? Are you saying you understand me and everyone out there entirely and can make the declaration seemingly out of thin air that there’s “someone out there” just for me? If there were a trillion humans on Earth, I’d still laugh at that naive ridiculousness.
  • It’s dangerous.
    • Look, I know you’ve found someone you like, and cherish, and wanna do life and stuff with, but thought experiment real quick. Just level with me here for a second. Pretend you’re a crazy Nazi snowflake with me and just hear me out. Do you think maybe it’s possible that (*lip smack*), you don’t know everything? As in, maybe there’s a thing or two about your partner you don’t know yet, or wouldn’t have even guessed, because the right elements having sparked the discovery yet. What if such knowledge would shatter this marriage you’ve worked so hard on?
      • On top of that, don’t people um—change? I mean, unless you’re reproducing uncomfortably, illegally close to the blood line, I’d say ten or twenty years from now, y’alls aren’t gonna be the same, and not in the simple, “I prefer pork instead of ham now,” kind of way. No, I’m talking about entirely different chemical reactions to stimuli you’ve been interacting with since you were born. The mind does not stop changing. If at any point in time you think you “know yourself”, slap yourself. That’ll never happen. You’re a different person now than you were before you started reading this post, even if you’ve read it before. A new copy of you has been made, in a sense. Adversely, if you leave a comment on this post, and I respond to it, you’re receiving feedback from an entirely different person than the author. The post is already made, the person I was when I was making it, is long gone.
  • It’s an institution.
    • Like college, work, training, anything we do in life that isn’t fun. Marriage is something people throw at us to make us as miserable as themselves. You don’t need college. You just need an education. You don’t need to work. You just need a good source of income. You don’t need to pay your taxes, you just do so you don’t go to jail. You don’t even need cops (and that’s not to devalue their work. I loves me, mah boyz in Blue), you just need an optimal, civilized society—which we obviously don’t have. I mean just turn on TLC. >.>
      • Likewise, you don’t “need” marriage. You just need companionship. We are social creatures after all.
  • Apparently, marriage gets you more money.
    • Well, no not exactly. Saying marriage “gives you more money” is like saying that moving to a certain city decreases your likeliness of being mugged. The problem really should not exist in the first place. Taxation is theft; everything can be privatized. Privatization > competition > variety > your little illusion of “freedom”.
      • Also add on top that most married couples have kids and that kids are um—costly. Yea. More money, my ass.

There’s no issue with people living together and raising children. Involvement with the government in those matters is detrimental to society however. If we’re going to truly move forward as a society, we need to wake up and realize the government has vastly more power than it needs. We also must recognize the true culprits of this power—the snowflakes.

The people that want to cuck this society into neutered, bitch-baby, mute status, but don’t wanna change a fiddle-fuck-worth for society and contribute something of value themselves. It really is irritating having to just assume no matter who I meet in life, that I can’t speak my mind without causing drama and may as well cut the conversation short every opportunity I get. My only other option would be to change, but I’ve sort of done that for two decades now, yet people still give me shit so, I’ve got to assume it’s not me, and it’s probably other people being um, hmm, gee—what could it be—snowflakes! Hahahaha. Because I am certainly not the problemo, senior hebanero. I’m gonna keep doing this policing my own mind, don’t tread on me, sort of thing I’ve got going on here.

After all, I can just keep being a Nazi, dude bro, beta douche bag and I’ll still find “the one”, huh snowflakes? I mean, like you brilliant mathematicians pointed out, there’s plenty of fish in the sea, or some shit.